Allow children to get bored this summer!
Schools have just closed and children now have plenty of time free from obligations and schoolwork. Children, like adults, need to relax and have fun. The demands and fast pace of everyday life in modern times make children seek respite from their daily schedule and routine.
Very soon, however, the phrase “I’m bored” becomes the most frequent expression of children. Several parents wonder how to keep their children busy.
What can I do when my child says he/she is bored?
- Give “space” to boredom. The truth is that boredom can help children develop valuable skills, problem-solving skills and organizational strategies. In fact, it’s not boredom itself that is of great value, but how we manage it. This management is directly linked to our ability to focus our attention and self-regulate. Children seek to start something new, use their imagination and develop their creativity to try new challenges, experiment, dare, and grow.
- Create an “Activity List”. Suggest to your children to co-create with you a list of activities they enjoy. The child can refer to this list and choose the one that interests him or her. Praise the child each time he or she manages to choose on his or her own. Children’s active participation provides a positive self-image, a sense of competence (“I can manage my own affairs”) and contributes to the acquisition of autonomy and independence.
- Accept emotional discomfort. Help children to accept the resentment that may result from a potential failure. Inevitably, there may be twists and turns and things may not turn out as planned. Work together, think of an alternative solution and help the child to understand and control his/her feelings.
- Limit the use of digital media. Keeping children occupied with audiovisual entertainment (computer, tablet, mobile phone, TV) to relieve the feeling of boredom is an “easy” and attractive option, but it is a temporary solution that may make the situation more difficult. Research suggests that children who regularly use digital media for long periods of time are more likely to feel boredom when they are not engaged in something similar.
Tips for happy holidays:
- Do not forget that holidays are a good opportunity to connect and spend quality time with your family. Play and have fun with your child.
- Remember that time in front of a screen requires total attention. Set boundaries and become a good example for children. The amount of time parents spend on a screen (screen time) is the strongest predictor of the amount of screen time children will spend respectively.
- Educate children about the dangers of excessive or incorrect use of digital media and surfing the internet and the rules we need to follow to protect ourselves.
- Agree beforehand and set clear limits as to the conditions of navigation. The time, space, content and activities when children are surfing the Internet should be supervised by parents.
- Replace screen time with other activities, giving more time for interaction, physical activity, relaxation and sleep.
- Allow the child to choose the activity he or she wants to engage in, offering many and varied choices. Firm control, which does not limit opportunities for experimentation and allows spontaneous expression, is associated with the child’s independence.
In conclusion, it should be noted that our aim is not to exclude every means of technology or to prohibit its use by children, but it is important that it is limited and that boundaries are respected. At the same time, following the above advice, each parent needs to offer a variety of stimuli and choices, so that the choice of electronic and technological media is not an one-way choice.
References
Bench, S.W. & Lench, H.C. (2013). On the function of boredom. Behavioral Sciences, 3(3), 459-72.
Bittman, M., Rutherford, L., Brown, J., & Unsworth, L. (2011). Digital Natives? New and Old Media and Children’s Outcomes. Australian journal of education, 55(2), 161-175
Drody, A. C., Ralph, B., Danckert, J., & Smilek, D. (2022). Boredom and Media Multitasking. Frontiers in psychology, 13, 807667.
Spacks, P. M. (1989). The necessity of boredom. The Virginia Quarterly Review, 65(4), 581-599.